


Soguem

by kimheechulmiki



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-28
Updated: 2016-03-28
Packaged: 2018-05-29 15:19:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6381667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kimheechulmiki/pseuds/kimheechulmiki
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>YooChun tracks down his love for a second chance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Soguem

“Well done! That was really great! All of you did well!” JunSu smiled and congratulated his team of young football players. “Go home, get some rest. We’ll resume training tomorrow morning, don’t be late or it’ll be several extra laps around the field.”

“Yes coach!” the group of boys bowed their thanks and wished their young coach goodbye.

JunSu grinned as he watched the young boys of various ages from 8 to 11 grumbling lightly as they made their way back to their hostel, which was just a few meters from the local community center. It had taken him months but he had managed to coach and shape these bed raggled bunch of kids who initially had no interest in football to winning their first ever match against a local youth club.

JunSu shaded his eyes with one hand and saw that the field was now empty and quiet. Everyone had left so he too made his way home but on his way he decided to make a quick stop at the beach not far from where he stayed. There, under a large shady pine tree was a low wooden bench, his favorite spot. He limped slowly, mindful of the uneven terrain and roots jutting out he carefully made his way there.

Reaching his destination JunSu huffed, wiping his brow before leaning heavily on his stick and slowly lowered himself onto the bench. He propped his walking stick against the tree trunk before massaging his throbbing knee.

It wasn’t always like this his life had been so different. He still remembered being scouted by football agents and how happy he was when he made it to the under 19 football squad representing South Korea.

His parents were so proud of him. And later through hard work and determination he managed to secure a spot in the under 21 team as well. He had everything, playing football, which he had loved every since he was young. He did well in school, was making tons of money and had a loving boyfriend, Park YooChun.

He was well on his way to be a star and things couldn’t get better when the national coach chose him to play in one of the international friendly matches where he earned his first cap and as icing on the cake he had scored the winning goal. JunSu was on top of his world when tragedy decided to strike.

He was on his way home after a fitting at the dressmaker for his upcoming engagement when a car rammed into his. JunSu was in critical condition having been in a coma for several months. When he woken he found out that both his legs were crushed from the accident and it would take months of rehabilitation before he could fully use them again.

So he had to hobble along with crutches. Not willing to give up so easily and getting by from the reassurance of his doctors that he would play football again, JunSu endured a year of painful therapy. His adoring, loving parents and YooChun were there to comfort him and urge him on whenever he wanted to give up. He was also fortunate that his teammates and fans were all very supportive of him.

Like all new things when the novelty rubbed off, people moved on to more exciting things. JunSu began to see less and less of his teammates and friends. At first he shook it off as them being busy with work and their own lives. But as time when on JunSu grew bitter and angry especially with seeing how little he had progressed in his healing.

He could walk with the aid of a walking stick but that was just about it. In the end he confronted his doctors who told him that the injury was just too severe and that he could never play football again.

Just like that JunSu felt that the world that once worshipped him had abandoned him. The contracts and deals he had were all cancelled along with an impersonal letter from the KFA informing him of his termination from the national squad. No one came to see him or cared anymore but his parents.

JunSu turned into a frustrated and short tempered person who found fault in everything and everyone. Soon,YooChun who used to come every day, spending nights at the hospital keeping him company, couldn’t take his temper tantrums and stayed away.

flashback

One afternoon YooChun came to see JunSu.

“So you’re leaving me too?” JunSu asked in a fierce voice, but deep inside he trembled in worry as he awaited the answer.

“Leave? No, no! Of course not!” YooChun violently shook his head as he involuntarily took a step back, recognizing that look and tone. To say Kim JunSu was in a bad mood was an understatement, he was more accurately described as close to erupting volcano.

“I told you JunSu-ah,” YooChun began softly, hoping that it would pacify his angry lover.

“I know, I heard you the first time, you have to go away for work. You would stay if I wanted but we both know that you have been waiting for this for a long time, plus this would give you some time to think and some space of your own,” JunSu sarcastically remarked.

“Space? No, JunSu you got it all wrong...” YooChun tried to explain, close to tears.

“Enough, leave me alone, get the hell out!” JunSu shouted.

end of flashback

JunSu sighed as he recalled the last conversation he had with YooChun a year ago. He regretted his actions and wished he had handled the situation better. He knew he was being selfish and should have let YooChun go since there wasn’t any point in being together for he had nothing to offer YooChun anymore.

It was then JunSu decided to leave and he did by leaving everything and everyone he had known all his life. He had some money from his savings and it was enough for him to get by for a bit until he could figure out what to do with his life. After weeks of aimless wandering he eventually came to a small sleepy seaside village. Delirious with fever he had collapsed on this very bench and it was there a man named Ji ChangWook found him. He was a teacher at the local school but also helped ran the local youth center for troubled or runaway teens.

Ji ChangWook had nursed JunSu back to health and without asking any questions had offered him a place to stay and provided him with food. It was on the tip of JunSu’s tongue to refuse but he was running low on money and still recovering from the fever so he swallowed his pride and accepted.

Days passed and ChangWook then gently suggested that JunSu coached the kids from the center he was volunteering at football after admitting that he had recognized who JunSu was. He had said that it would only be for the summer as after that the youth center would be demolished. Due to a tight budget the local council had no choice but to move the kids to another center located in the next town.

And now summer was almost over and JunSu wondered what he would do next, with the youth center closing along with the school as well. ChangWook who had received his transfer papers had invited JunSu to come with him to his next post.

JunSu had refused knowing ChangWook meant well but he didn’t want to give the man false hope by agreeing. He knew that the teacher had feelings for him, feelings that he could never return.

Feelings, JunSu chuckled to himself. His thoughts flew back to YooChun, to how it all began between the two of them. It had started innocently enough, a small crush that soon developed into something deeper. JunSu would always made sure that he looked his best whenever he knew YooChun was about. He never forgot how happy he felt when on one Valentine’s Day he had given the love of his life a bouquet of roses made from chocolates and shyly confessed to YooChun, who had hugged him and told him he felt the same way.

JunSu sighed as he watched the sun dipping into the vast greenish sea. He just loved sitting here doing nothing but staring at the scenery. He ears perked when he heard someone calling him, a voice he knew very well, ChangWook who would often come looking for JunSu if he was not home yet.

“I’m coming Changwook ssi… I’m not going to miss dinner…” JunSu said laughing as he turned and saw the man with his boyish good looks walking towards him. But to his surprise he saw that ChangWook was not alone, instead he was with someone who JunSu hadn’t seen in a year but was just in his thoughts.

“YooChun….” JunSu whispered as his eyes widen with each step YooChun was taking towards him.

He almost didn’t recognize his old boyfriend, who looked a lot leaner and paler. The shirt he was wearing looked two sizes too big and YooChun had pulled back his hair into a ponytail resting at the nape of his neck. Chunnie had never grown his hair that long before, I wonder why didn’t he get a hair cut? JunSu asked himself.

“Hello JunSu,” YooChun said with a wide smile. He had readied himself for this meeting like forever and yet he still felt nervous and uncertain what to do. How he had longed and waited for this moment but now that it had arrived he actually felt scared. What if JunSu didn’t love me anymore?

“Lost your way? What are you doing here YooChun?” JunSu scowled noting that ChangWook had remained behind by the cluster of trees at the top of the small slope.

“I…I’ve been looking for you JunSu-ah, I missed you,” YooChun replied while trying not to be unnerved by JunSu’s rudeness. He looked around and wondered if he should sit next to JunSu.

“Really? How did you find me?” JunSu asked, his voice tinge with impatience.

“Uh…It wasn’t easy but I did!” YooChun happily exclaimed.

“Yeah, I bet. Let’s stop with the small talk okay? What do you really want?” JunSu asked with narrowed eyes.

“Want? Why you of course, it took me 10 months to find you…” YooChun answered but was rudely interrupted by JunSu’s loud exclamation.

“Please YooChun, you don’t want a cripple. Just go back the way you came and leave me alone,” JunSu scoffed, folding his arms across his chest and stared sulkily into the sea.

“I’m not leaving you, ” YooChun said in a determined voice.

JunSu rolled his eyes and sighed loudly, “Fine, then I’ll leave,”

JunSu stretched out his hand for his walking stick and proceeded to make his way up the sand dunes to where he saw ChangWook hovering like a nervous hen. He was halfway there when he heard YooChun calling after him.

“Yah! Kim JunSu!” YooChun cried out as he quickly brushed away the tears that were falling down his face, “If you want to break up with me, have the guts to say it to my face!” Watching JunSu limped away from him, he thought he could hear his heart break into pieces at being left behind but he was still glad to see that JunSu’s limp wasn’t as pronounced as before. JunSu’s self proclaimed as a cripple was too harsh, but that was just JunSu, the man he loved.

YooChun held his breath as he eyed JunSu’s back noticing that JunSu had stopped and was slowly straightening his back.

Please, please JunSu turn around, please come back to me, YooChun silently begged and prayed.

JunSu gripped his stick until his fingers hurt, looking down he could see his knuckles had turned white. Break up? Did YooChun say that?

Gritting his teeth JunSu slowly spun around and made his way back towards YooChun who was still by the bench. Once he got closer he said, “10 months? What the hell were you doing for the two months before that?”

“Two months?” YooChun questioned completely taken aback by what JunSu had asked. He had not expect JunSu to suddenly ask him such a question.

“Yeah Chunnie, two months?” JunSu repeated, jutting his chin towards YooChun while balancing himself against the bench with his walking stick.

“Right, two months,” YooChun started pausing to tuck a stray strand of hair behind his ear. Hair that he had vowed not to cut his hair until he had found his JunSu.

“I went to Tokyo for work, remember? Yeah… but I couldn’t concentrate on work because I kept thinking of you, so after two months,” YooChun stopped his explaination and held up two fingers to emphasis his point, “I quit and came back to Seoul only to find that you were gone. Missing and no one knew where you were.”

“I started to look for you. I called up everyone we knew but it was as though you had totally vanished from the surface of the earth,” YooChun recalled and quickly hurried on when he saw JunSu’s bored expression, “I remembered that you once said after we watched that episode on 1 night and 2 days where they traveled along the coast of the South Korean peninsular, that you wanted to do that too.”

“Is that so?” JunSu asked drily though inwardly he was surprised that YooChun actually remembered something that he himself had completely forgotten.

“Hmm, yes so I went to about every town until I came here and found you. I was lucky enough to meet Ji ChangWook ssi who told me about you,” YooChun said.

“YooChun, listen to me I have nothing to offer you. Just go and leave me alone,” JunSu softly said as he started up the slopes again, only this time YooChun grabbed his arm to stop him.

“No, not this time. I love you and I’m not leaving you ever again,” YooChun stated firmly accompanied by a violent shake of his head. “Being apart from you made me realized what a selfish bastard I was for leaving you. I’ll never forgive myself for that. I’m weak giving up so easily only to find that I can’t survive without you. I realized that all this time I’ve been leaning on you, depending on you. I’m not like you JunSu-ah, you’re strong. I mean you looked good and fit. You obviously got on fine with life without me.” YooChun ended his words with a heartfelt sigh.

“Fit? Hah! Park YooChun, have you lost your mind?” JunSu replied bitterly tugging his arm away.

“Lost? I suppose so,” YooChun sadly agreed as he sat down on the bench. My mind, my heart, my everything and …you.

All the time YooChun was talking, JunSu couldn’t look at him, for if not he might give in to YooChun’s pleading. Instead he focused his eyes on ChangWook who was anxiously waiting for him in the distance, whom although looked disinterested in what was happening yet he would peeped at their direction every now and then.

“What the hell are you babbling about now?” An irritated JunSu asked as he focused back on YooChun.

“I am a fool, the biggest one ever. What was I thinking?” YooChun sighed deeply as he continued, “It has been a year, how could I expect things to just fall back into place or for you to greet me with arms wide open. I didn’t stop to think that perhaps, you already have someone else in your arms,” YooChun said sadly, his heart sank when he had followed JunSu’s gaze and saw who JunSu was looking at.

Choosing to ignore what YooChun had said, JunSu looked up at the darkening skies before saying, “It’s quiet here after dark unlike the city, you better go. Good bye YooChun.” JunSu nodded curtly to YooChun at that before making his way once more towards ChangWook.

No, no I can’t leave, I won’t give up not this time, YooChun gritted his teeth in resolve and jumped to his feet scrambling after JunSu. “You weren’t listening were you?” YooChun said as he trotted up the slope beside JunSu. “ChangWook ssi invited me to stay for the night,”

“Huh?” JunSu glared first at YooChun then at ChangWook whose guilty face did all the answering for him.

~..~..~..~..~

JunSu ate dinner in silence and then retired to his room right after. He had barely uttered a word and knew he was being rude to his host but he didn’t care. He laid his head on his pillow and heard YooChun’s and ChangWook’s voices making him wonder what they were talking about but he was too angry to really bother.

The room was dark and quiet when JunSu was woken up the next morning by the sound of the crashing waves. He sat up rubbing his eyes as he looked out of the window while breathing in the fresh salty morning air deeply. From the orange and pink rays streaked across the sky he guessed that it was just after dawn. He has spent half the night thinking about what YooChun had said and eventually made up his mind on what to do even of he was still unsure. Getting dressed he hobbled out of his room towards the living room where YooChun was still asleep curled up like a ball.

He gently shook YooChun so as not to wake up ChangWook whose room was just a few feet away.

“Wha…? Su, uh… what’s going…on?” YooChun groggily asked.

“Shh…follow me,” JunSu whispered as he urged YooChun to follow him.

Both men walked in silence with a half asleep and confused YooChun while JunSu just didn’t feel like talking. After what seems like a long time for YooChunbut in actual fact was just a few minutes, JunSu finally stopped walking. Looking around YooChun saw that they were at a bottom of a hill where there was a well “worn pathway” leading up to an old lighthouse.

He opened his mouth to ask something but stopped when JunSu motioned him to continue walking. Puzzled YooChun shrugged his shoulders and did as he was told, wondering if JunSu came here often. He cannot help but stare at every step that JunSu took, steps that were sure and confident despite being a little slow and unknowingly made him feel proud of the man. Soon they came to a clearing on the top of the hill where the lighthouse looked like it was perched precariously by the edge overlooking the sea.

YooChun looked at the building in awe admiring the architecture. He tried to read the words of the plaque erected next to it but the lighting was rather poor and all he could make out was that the abandoned lighthouse was now a maritime museum of sorts.

“Chun-ah!” JunSu’s called out suddenly and beckoned him to come to where he was.

YooChun turned to see JunSu resting on a fallen tree trunk and quickly hurried over. The bare patches by the trunk showed that it was a favorite spot to rest for the weary hikers.

YooChun chose to sit next to JunSu and waited for him to say something however the spectacular view took both his attention and breath away. In front of him against the orange- pink and blue skies was the vast turquoise sea, and he could make out several fishing boats bopping up and down with the waves. A sudden gust of wind caused him to shiver making him wished he had put on a sweater before leaving the house with JunSu.

“Cold?” JunSu asked and automatically wrapping his arm around YooChun.

“Thanks,” YooChun mumbled with a nod. JunSu’s behavior was getting more unpredictable as his behaving so differently from the evening before. This was so unlike the JunSu from the evening before. He didn’t understand why JunSu brought him all the way up here for.

“I did a lot of thinking last night,” JunSu’s soft voice suddenly broke the silence.

“Eh? Omo!” YooChun turned around so fast that he thought his neck would snap. He was completely absorbed in watching the scenery and thinking of what JunSu’s intention was that JunSu’s sudden remark had startled him.

“I kept thinking about what you said,” JunSu went on ignoring YooChun’s outburst.

“Wait, JunSu did you bring me all the way up here to … to break up with me? “YooChun gasped as it suddenly dawned upon him what was on JunSu’s mind.

“YooChun…” JunSu hesitated for a bit, not sure of how he was going to say what he wanted.

“I’m sorry JunSu, you’re right I should go,” YooChun tearfully said and got to his feet shakily. He now understood why JunSu woke him up and brought him all the way here for. JunSu was going to break up with him and YooChun didn’t want to hear something so painful instead opting to leave just as JunSu wanted.

JunSu licked his dry lips and eyed YooChun’s lanky form before saying, “I thought you wanted to break up with me.”

“Anni, anni I only said that to attract your attention, because I needed to say… oh what’s the use?” YooChun sat down again, tears falling uncontrollably.

“Neither did I,” JunSu replied as he shifted closer to YooChun. He slipped his hand into his pocket and took out a handkerchief which he handed to YooChun.

“Huh?” YooChun sniffed but accepted the hankie anyway.

“I’m… I’m,” JunSu stopped and a heart tugging sigh escaped his lips before he spoke again, “I’m not who I used to be Chun-ah. I walk with a limp, I can’t play football anymore. I’m useless, I’m a cripple. Do you want to spend the rest of your life being burdened by one?” JunSu asked looking deeply into YooChun’s teary eyes.

“Don’t say that, never ever say that again. You are not useless nor are you a cripple or a burden! And yes a million times yes, I want you for the rest of my life,” YooChun firmly stated with a nod. At first he thought JunSu was really ending it between them but when he said he didn’t want to break up either it had given YooChun a glimmer of hope that perhaps JunSu still loved him.

“Not being able to play football isn’t the end of the world and as far as I can see other than that a slight limp you are perfectly fine,” YooChun vehemently said, his eyes ran up and down JunSu’s frame lingering for a little bit longer at the crotch area.

“You don’t know what you’re saying,” JunSu huffed, annoyed.

“No? I understand that football meant everything to you but jagiya, there’s other things in life,” YooChun went on but he didn’t miss the slight blush on JunSu’s face.

“Such as?” JunSu snapped at him.

“Well for starters there’s me,” YooChun smiled as he pointed a finger at himself. “You could also go back to school.”

And when JunSu didn’t say anything YooChun slipped his arm around JunSu’s arm and calmly said, “Whatever your decision is jagiya, I’ll be with you by your side, always and that’s a promise.”

“I don’t know, I mean you know that football is my life, it has always been…I’m at lost Chunnie, I don’t know what to do,” JunSu bit his lips trying to stop tears that were threatening to fall.

“Let’s take things slow, okay? One day at a time?” YooChun coaxed gently. “We’ll figure it out. Besides two heads are better than one.”

“Hmpf, you’ve always been the clever one,” JunSu said as he poked YooChun’s ribs with his elbow.

“Don’t I know it? I mean look who I chose for a husband ne?” YooChun chortled as he boldly leaned over to kiss JunSu’s flushed cheek. His heart was beating a happy tune, feeling JunSu’s barrier slowly thawing. This was the JunSu he had known and fallen in love with and he would spend the rest of his life making it up to him.

“Hus-band?” JunSu repeated each syllable as if it was a word he had never heard before.

“Kim JunSu! Did you think you could get out of that promise? You proposed to me remember?” An indigant YooChun exclaimed loudly.

“Do you still want me for a husband? Are you sure?” JunSu asked but kept his eyes on the lighthouse. The accident happened just a few days before their engagement and they have never gotten the chance to exchange the diamond engagement rings they had bought earlier which he wondered what happened to.

“Yes,” YooChun whispered in JunSu’s cold ears causing him to shiver involuntarily.

Looking down JunSu smiled and took YooChun’s cold hand in his and they both just sat there saying nothing but enjoying the view as the sky slowly gave brightened signaling the start of a new day.

YooChun was had been resting his head on JunSu’s shoulder suddenly sat up. There was something he needed to know and so he said, “Uh JunSu-ah, you know about ChangWook ssi…”

“What about him?” JunSu replied, raising an inquiring eyebrow.

“Well… I was talking to him yesterday and I kinda had a feeling he likes you,” YooChun said slowly, stealing a glance at JunSu. He seen the looks ChangWook gave his man and couldn’t but help wonder so he had to ask JunSu.

“I know,” JunSu replied.

“Oh, you do? Oh! Umm… I mean did you and him? Did anything…?” YooChun stammered, afraid to ask the real question.

“Nope, nothing happened. There is only you, Park YooChun who reigns in my heart,” JunSu proclaimed, taking YooChun’s hand and placed it over his heart.

With that said YooChun, with a big smile on his face snuggled up to JunSu again and both men lapsed into a comfortable silence, something that two people who loved and understood each other could enjoy.

Moments passed before YooChun lifted his head from JunSu’s shoulders again. He wrapped both his arms around JunSu’s waist before leaning over to kiss a surprised JunSu who had beens lost in his thoughts. This caused both men to lose their balance and topple to the ground. They fell with their backs on the cold damp ground and their ankles resting on the piece of log.

YooChun sat up first and anxiously peered at a quiet JunSu who was still lying on the ground, “Oh my God, Su-ah, are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere? I’m sorry jagiya, JunSu-ah?”

JunSu looked up at his panicky lover and laughed softly, “Stop fussing Chun-ah and come here.” He opened up his arms signaling to YooChun to come closer.

“Oh!” YooChun blushed but complied immediately and laid his head onto JunSu’s chest. He could hear JunSu’s steady heartbeat and feel the heat from JunSu’s body warming him up, making him glad now that he didn’t put on a sweater.

“Comfy?” A deep throaty chuckle escaped JunSu’s lips.

“Mmm,” YooChun gave a content sigh.

“Thank you for looking for me and patiently waiting for me. I love you YooChun-ah,” JunSu whispered as he dropped a kiss on YooChun’s head.

YooChun giggled before saying, “I love you too,”

end of Soguem.


End file.
